The Biggest Lie You Can Tell Yourself

Photo by gnuckx @ licensed under CC BY 2.0

Photo by gnuckx @ licensed under CC BY 2.0


What do you do when you find yourself alone? Sometimes, that sounds great doesn’t it? Especially if you’re a mother with lots of children running around or you have several jobs to pay the bills. Then time alone is a wonderful respite. But what if you don’t want to be alone? What if that alone time feels more like loneliness? Loneliness is not a feeling most of us enjoy. Speaking for myself, I enjoy being alone but too much of it makes me feel lost. Then I start thinking, which is never good under these circumstances. My brain tells me lies: no one loves me, no one cares about me, no one calls me, no one knows I exist.

The biggest lie is that I’m insignificant.

When I feel like I’m standing at the end of a pier all by myself there are a number of things I can do to erase the lies including the biggest one of all.

First, I need to have an attitude of gratitude. This can include getting a pen and paper and writing down all the things I’m grateful to have in my life. My family, friends, a vehicle that runs, reading, writing, baseball, movies. Anything that makes me happy generally ends up on my list.

Second, I call a friend and we laugh. Whoever said laughter is the best medicine is right. Sharing a laugh makes the lies vanish immediately. Then I get a wonderful understanding; I’m not alone at all. I’m never alone unless I choose to be…it’s a choice. So is loneliness. I can call that same friend and meet for coffee or we can go for a walk together.

Lastly, I don’t need to sit in front of the television and feel sorry for myself. Unless I want that, again, it’s all a choice. I can get on my computer and write or I can journal and acknowledge my feelings and move on. Then I can pick out a good book, the one I’ve been wanting to read, take a deep breath, and plunge into another world. Books are wonderful companions. I’m never lonely with a good book in my hands.

#getyourwriteon #family #friends #books #writing


About Cynthia

I'm a little crazy but who isn't? I enjoy writing about my many odd experiences and my perception is really altered by time, age, and drugs. Not really but it sounds cool. I'm from Los Angeles and moved to North Carolina. I don't like culture shock but it happens anyway.
This entry was posted in Lies You Tell Yourself and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

9 Responses to The Biggest Lie You Can Tell Yourself

  1. What great advice! Having six kids I used to cherish my alone time but now that they are older, I get down that they “have moved on” and being alone starts to echo more of “loneliness” than of “free time.” Thank you for the reminder of my options!

    • Cynthia says:

      Thanks for reading, I always love to see your comments here! I found that being single, with no kids, there was nothing but loneliness for a long time. Then I found there were solutions. Now it’s been a while since I’ve experienced loneliness…unless I want to revisit it! No thanks!

  2. Anonymous says:

    Good reading Cindy, as always!

  3. That is great advice! You are so right, it is easy to let our thoughts take control and go to a darker place, and we don’t need to live there! It’s good to have our own time and just as good to keep those connections open!

  4. I love this post. I think we all struggle with that same thing. My escape is a movie because I’m too distracted to make it all the way to the end of a book 😉

  5. kyangel17 says:

    I usually blog, but sometimes I read. The problem with reading though, is that when I get caught up in a book I have to keep reading to the end. Sometimes this takes 72 to 100 hours, depending on which book. Most movies will put me to sleep, if they don’t happen to be tear jerkers. I have a love/hate relationship with those.

    • Cynthia says:

      I agree completely with tear jerkers and have to be in the right mood to see them. I also read books all the way through unless they’re boring. I will still give them a chance but I can put those down for a while! Thanks for the comment!

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