Larry’s Kids


Yes, you read that correctly. Larry’s kids not Jerry’s kids, though it’s always possible they were both. There were 3 of them and they were awful. Well the youngest was kind of cute in her own way but she primary lived with her mother. So we got the two that were horrible. Daniel and Carrie had problems. So my brother and I had some fun with them. Mostly Carrie got the worst because she was a tattle tale, a cry baby, and a whiner. When Daniel started tipping over all the furniture we simply handcuffed him to the table. He would kick us with his orthopedic shoes. Did he need orthopedic shoes? No, but that’s what he wore and we never figured out why. We just handcuffed him to the table again. Finally he gave up and joined my brother and I to pick on Carrie.

pillow fight

One of my favorite activities was to tell Daniel and Carrie that the winner of a pillow fight got one whole dollar. Trick was that the winner had to make the other one cry. We gave Carrie the bigger feather pillow to make it an even match. The went nuts for the money. Daniel always won and Carrie always cried. One time Daniel kicked Carrie in the crotch. “I kicked her in her front butt,” he yelled. As she cried (always and for everything), we had Daniel explain what “front butt” meant.

“There is front butt, front middle butt, middle butt, back middle butt, and back butt.” My brother and I burst into laughter. Sadly, I now use this terminology. I think it’s anatomically correct but I could be wrong…


About Cynthia

I'm a little crazy but who isn't? I enjoy writing about my many odd experiences and my perception is really altered by time, age, and drugs. Not really but it sounds cool. I'm from Los Angeles and moved to North Carolina. I don't like culture shock but it happens anyway.
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